Trigger Etiquette & Entitlement

First off I would like to state that I do not put trigger warnings in front of any of my articles or quotes and I have no plan to in the future due to the fact that this is my personal Facebook page and not a public group. I decided to write this today for the simple fact that recently I’ve had a few people approach me in such a way that I feel is disrespectful and inappropriate. Both of these individuals are obviously writers as according to their personal description on their Facebook page and I think part of it has to do with the fact that they wish to attract some attention their way from some of my more popular posts.

The other more major part of it is that I think both of these individuals were triggered by various quotes that I posted and then they proceeded to vent their anger and frustration about being triggered all over me. So, I just thought that I would explain for all of my readers how I react to these kinds of behaviors. If you post comments under one of my postings and it becomes too personal which is inappropriate or you become rude through insults, generally disrespectful or sexually inappropriate in nature you will either be unfriended or blocked or both. I have a zero tolerance policy when it comes to these kinds of behaviors and if I feel that you are behaving in what I consider to be an inappropriate and disrespectful manner then you’re gone from my friends list.

I myself have triggers due to past trauma and I do understand the concept that it is difficult to control your emotional response, but you do have the ability to control your actions towards others even if you can’t control the existence of your feelings. Just a thought that if your immediate response to anything I post is a need to write some extremely long emotionally loaded rant that lacks grammar, punctuation and spelling then maybe you should take a moment and consider the fact that you’re being triggered and that you should probably not vent all over someone else.

Also a lot of the quotes that I post are not mine they actually belong to other writers, so my suggestion is this that after a period of reflection maybe you should write a response to that writer by finding their contact information and sending it to them instead of to me. Whatever you decide, realize that when it comes to my personal Facebook page or any group that I manage that if you behave in a way that I feel is inappropriate and disrespectful you will most likely be removed and block. As a rule of thumb when I’m reading any comment if someone starts out OK then proceeds to become disrespectful I stop reading it and I immediately deal with the behavior.

My level of response to their behavior depends on the level of their disrespect and inappropriateness and it can go from unfriending to blocking to potentially reporting them to Facebook. The latest person who posted something this morning that I removed was not only completely irrational, but also supported the idea that we literally should stay within abusive relationships and continue to try to Love these individuals out of their abusive ways. The person went on further to say insulting and derogatory comments towards me on a personal level.

The reality is that I will never condone the idea of rewarding people for their abusive behaviors by continuing to associate with them. I do not support the idea of anyone staying in a situation with an abusive person especially when that person is causing harm to them either mentally, emotionally and or physically. It is not our responsibility to fix these individuals it is their personal responsibility to start their own healing. It was obvious from the things this person was saying in their comment that more than likely they have had some destructive behaviors of their own that have harmed people and that they believe that they are “entitled” to the love and affection of people regardless of these harmful behaviors effects.

Another truth is this that if you are exhibiting abusive behaviors it is going to make it really difficult for people around you to build up any affection towards you because of the simple fact that your behaviors invoke fear within them. This fear is totally warranted and if you’re one of these people that has become afraid of someone like this please listen to your fears and avoid or leave them. Regardless of whether it’s somebody that you’ve been with for a very long time or someone you just met and your instinct is a fear response then please run the other direction. Never let anybody make you feel like you are obligated emotionally to them because this is a form of emotional abuse. First and foremost the only person entitled to your love is yourself and no one else is entitled to your attention, love or your body and never let anyone make you feel otherwise.

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